Waist-deep in grade A imbecility

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Bill and friend. (Bill's on the left).

Bill (left) and friend.

SMALL CAVEAT: That America is by now a nation weighed down by Olympic-class stupidity is becoming a fact even to people not exactly noted for their acumen…So it was kind of inevitable that Bill Maher, well-known for his irreverence, would have something outrageously…true to say about the dilapidated state of the national discourse. But here’s the rub: while Bill’s take on American stupidity is totally on target, Maher himself–smarts notwithstanding– retains some blind spots. For one, he still seems to worship at the altar of a “misunderstood Obama”, fraught with redeeming promise, a common ailment among liberals, although, in fairness, he seems on the road to an early recovery.  This proclamation, for example, struck me as a bit dumb:

And if you want to call me an elitist for this, I say thank you. Yes, I want decisions made by an elite group of people who know what they’re talking about. That means Obama budget director Peter Orszag, not Sarah Palin.

Why? Because smarts is not enough, Bill, and you ought to know it. Kissinger is smart. And the devil is plenty smart, too. Is that something to celebrate? We need smarts AND dedication to the people’s cause, dedication to social justice, otherwise smarts makes the criminality all the worse. To date Obama has not named a single person distinguished for doing the people’s bidding. So why put our faith on Orszag, or whomever Obama picks over Palin? By putting his faith on the “Obama team” he’s merely trading the crude, in your face obnoxious and unrepentantly smug right-wing misleadership of a Palin for the smooth snake oil oozing out of the current White House, where centrism is king and the plutocracy rules. Under these circumstances, the guy who shouted to keep “the f….g government’s hands off my Medicare” was not completely bonkers. He was right without really knowing it. For Obama, a creature of the country’s financial oligarchy has repeatedly said that some of the financing for his Rube Goldberg health reform plan would come–inter alia- via cutbacks in Medicare and Medicaid! Which proves, I guess, that even a broken clock can tell the right time twice a day.—P. Greanville

Bill Maher

Host of HBO’s “Real Time with Bill Maher”

Posted: August 7, 2009 12:29 PM

New Rule: Smart President ≠ Smart Country

New Rule: Just because a country elects a smart president doesn’t make it a smart country. A few weeks ago I was asked by Wolf Blitzer if I thought Sarah Palin could get elected president, and I said I hope not, but I wouldn’t put anything past this stupid country. It was amazing – in the minute or so between my calling America stupid and the end of the Cialis commercial, CNN was flooded with furious emails and the twits hit the fan. And you could tell that these people were really mad because they wrote entirely in CAPITAL LETTERS!!! It’s how they get the blood circulating when the Cialis wears off. Worst of all, Bill O’Reilly refuted my contention that this is a stupid country by calling me a pinhead, which A) proves my point, and B) is really funny coming from a doody-face like him.

Now, the hate mail all seemed to have a running theme: that I may live in a stupid country, but they lived in the greatest country on earth, and that perhaps I should move to another country, like Somalia. Well, the joke’s on them because I happen to have a summer home in Somalia… and no, I can’t show you an original copy of my birth certificate because Woody Harrelson spilled bong water on it.

And before I go about demonstrating how, sadly, easy it is to prove the dumbness dragging down our country, let me just say that ignorance has life and death consequences. On the eve of the Iraq War, 69% of Americans thought Saddam Hussein was personally involved in 9/11. Four years later, 34% still did. Or take the health care debate we’re presently having: members of Congress have recessed now so they can go home and “listen to their constituents.” An urge they should resist because their constituents don’t know anything. At a recent town-hall meeting in South Carolina, a man stood up and told his Congressman to “keep your government hands off my Medicare,” which is kind of like driving cross country to protest highways.

I’m the bad guy for saying it’s a stupid country, yet polls show that a majority of Americans cannot name a single branch of government, or explain what the Bill of Rights is. 24% could not name the country America fought in the Revolutionary War. More than two-thirds of Americans don’t know what’s in Roe v. Wade. Two-thirds don’t know what the Food and Drug Administration does. Some of this stuff you should be able to pick up simply by being alive. You know, like the way the Slumdog kid knew about cricket.

Not here. Nearly half of Americans don’t know that states have two senators and more than half can’t name their congressman. And among Republican governors, only 30% got their wife’s name right on the first try.

Sarah Palin says she would never apologize for America. Even though a Gallup poll says 18% of Americans think the sun revolves around the earth. No, they’re not stupid. They’re interplanetary mavericks. A third of Republicans believe Obama is not a citizen, and a third of Democrats believe that George Bush had prior knowledge of the 9/11 attacks, which is an absurd sentence because it contains the words “Bush” and “knowledge.”

People bitch and moan about taxes and spending, but they have no idea what their government spends money on. The average voter thinks foreign aid consumes 24% of our federal budget. It’s actually less than 1%. And don’t even ask about cabinet members: seven in ten think Napolitano is a kind of three-flavored ice cream. And last election, a full one-third of voters forgot why they were in the booth, handed out their pants, and asked, “Do you have these in a relaxed-fit?”

And I haven’t even brought up America’s religious beliefs. But here’s one fun fact you can take away: did you know only about half of Americans are aware that Judaism is an older religion than Christianity? That’s right, half of America looks at books called the Old Testament and the New Testament and cannot figure out which one came first.

And these are the idiots we want to weigh in on the minutia of health care policy? Please, this country is like a college chick after two Long Island Iced Teas: we can be talked into anything, like wars, and we can be talked out of anything, like health care. We should forget town halls, and replace them with study halls. There’s a lot of populist anger directed towards Washington, but you know who concerned citizens should be most angry at? Their fellow citizens. “Inside the beltway” thinking may be wrong, but at least it’s thinking, which is more than you can say for what’s going on outside the beltway.

And if you want to call me an elitist for this, I say thank you. Yes, I want decisions made by an elite group of people who know what they’re talking about. That means Obama budget director Peter Orszag, not Sarah Palin.

Which is the way our founding fathers wanted it. James Madison wrote that “pure democracy” doesn’t work because “there is nothing to check… an obnoxious individual.” Then, in the margins, he doodled a picture of Joe the Plumber.

Until we admit there are things we don’t know, we can’t even start asking the questions to find out. Until we admit that America can make a mistake, we can’t stop the next one. A smart guy named Chesterton once said: “My country, right or wrong is a thing no patriot would ever think of saying… It is like saying ‘My mother, drunk or sober.'” To which most Americans would respond: “Are you calling my mother a drunk?”

Bill Maher is the host of HBO’s “Real Time with Bill Maher,” and will be joined on the show tonight by Arianna Huffington. “Real Time” airs fridays on HBO at 10:00PM Eastern Time.

3 comments on “Waist-deep in grade A imbecility
  1. Sodammy Hoosane were evul !
    Bush was doin what Gawd dun tole him tado !
    Oh damn. I dun spilt my beer on me Bible and got my pistel whet to boot !
    Gawd Blass Amurka !
    Idiocracy. Land of freeDumb.

  2. Quote:
    James Madison wrote that “pure democracy” doesn’t work because “there is nothing to check… an obnoxious individual.”
    Everyone who doesn’t know what Madison really wrote should refer to the Federalist Papers. Bill, you should be ashamed of that attempt at deception. Really.

  3. Good piece. Maher certainly has some blind spots. However, Maher has been attacking Obama. He did a whole skit on “This is not the change I voted for”. It was on You Tube, Daily KOS, Hunffington Post etc, which had links to the original, which has since been removed. Maher was actually booed by his studio audience over the attack, and the following week was cheered for making the same assertion again, which he took note of.

    This is a quote by Bill Maher on Barack Obama taken from the Huffington Post:

    “On his HBO show Friday night, Bill Maher complained about President Obama’s frequent public outings. He compared the president to Lindsay Lohan: in the papers a lot but not doing very much. “This is not what I voted for,” Maher said, arguing that Obama has maintained his personal popularity but failed to make real progress on health care, banks, or climate change. “What he needs in his personality is a little George Bush … What we need to do is to marry the good ideas that Barack Obama has with a little bit of that Bush attitude and certitude.”

    It seems Maher does attack Obama, but generally defends him when attacking conservatives – lets face it, there is a bit of a culture war going on. Much of the time the conservative attacks on Obama are simply racist…in other words the attacks don’t come from a rational and thoughtful place.

    Maher is not a towering intellectual…but to state he does not understand that Obama is a not all he is cracked up to be is an erroneous argument. If anything we should attack Maher for not siding more with Hip-hop emcee Mos Def when he talked about it being unfair that the U.S. gets to decide who is in or out of the “nuclear club”, and then went to take it real easy on that imbelic drunk Christopher Hitches when he argued that contrary…it seemed Maher had illusion when it came to his “atheist friend” …Hitchens is an asshole.

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